See the silver lining...

Why is it difficult to see how far you've really come? Is it just me? I know that I am feeling a ton better than I was a month ago. I have returned to a pretty normal schedule with little pain in doing it. I still have some lingering anxiety and moments in my days that are worse than others, but if I had a time machine to go back into the past one month I know I would see a very different girl.

So, why do I still have these moments when I feel not good enough? I know the answer already, "Everyone has moments like this." But like I said in my last post, I am a perfectionist, or as I'd like to think, a recovering perfectionist, and so it makes it hard for me to see the silver lining sometimes. Ross and I just had a conversation as he and Elyse walked out the door to get a special ice cream treat at the DQ (a reward for dry undies all day.....Elyse's not Ross!) and I was starting to mope about how it wasn't fair. But here's the other me talking:
1. Be happy for others even when you are not happy. It will make you a happier person.
2. Realize how blessed you are to have Ross as such an amazing dad to Elyse.
3. Realize how blessed you are to have Elyse who loves her Mama so much that she promised to bring me back a red DQ spoon!
4. Really reflect on how you are feeling now and decide if you'd want to deal with the consequences of eating a huge bowl of sugar.
5. Go with them and enjoy the family time, or relax in the alone time and smile thinking about how much fun Daddy/Daughter time is for them.

Look at all those positives. I really am a happy, positive, out-going person under this little black cloud filled with life-lessons that follows me around once in awhile. And like I told Ross, most people don't quit smoking on their first try even though they know it is best for them, so don't be so hard on yourself as you go through this process of giving up wheat and sugar. I've been eating it for the past 29 years. That's a pretty serious addiction. :)

And a little advice from Dr. Troy...In talking with his patients who are over 100, he always asks them to give a little advice on life. He said that each conversation has 2 things in common: That they are here for a purpose. God had a purpose for them in their life and they have not fulfilled it all yet. And the second one being, worry less about money because it always works out. That's some pretty good advice that I try to remember every day.